Captain Verdana sat in the office waiting room.  The Admiral wanted to speak to him about the fiasco.  He sighed.  

The search for the ship had begun.  In relative terms, they were looking for an object the size of a small super-ball.  It would be an arduous job, but it had to be done.

The Admiral stepped into the office and Captain Verdana stood and saluted as duty dictated.  

“Sit,” The Admiral ordered sharply.

Captain Verdana did as he was told and began to fear what was coming to him.

“We have declared this planet, Earth, a galactic enemy,” the admiral venomously spat as he leaned forward and clenched his fists.  “They are to be destroyed.  Do you understand me?”

Captain Verdana nodded nervously for a second before he recalled that he needed to verbally answer.  “Yes, sir,” he said.

Waiting and Stranded I

Waiting and Stranded I

Crammed into the tiny little escape pod designed for one person, Captain Verdana and Giq waited impatiently for rescue.  The Escape was a narrow one, and Captain Verdana had no clue wether any other of the crew made it out before the white hole implosion device activated.  In short, it was a storage unit devised to transport large amounts of cargo in only a tiny cargo hold.    Only, it compressed the entire ship when the fool bag of chips activated it. 

Captain Verdana huffed again.  He was infuriated.  Now he felt little to no guilt about his mission.  Earth was to be destroyed, and he was more than excited to help in the destruction.  

meanwhile...

meanwhile...

Meanwhile, behind the facade of this innocent story of adventure...

I sit at home, hating my job.  Jesus, the Mexican Gardener Sandwich, advised me to plant habanero peppers, so I did.  He’s been pretty helpful at giving advice and sitting around. 

I’ve been trying to make some big moves in my life, and I feel like a salted slug in molasses.  But, it’ll happen, I suppose. 

I’m looking to do some interesting things in the world of my writing.  I’ve been struggling with my last chapters of this novel, and I really want to start this new one.  I’m not sure if I should really be going on about this fucking shit, but I guess I need to fucking vent occasionally.

Fuck...

Home I

Home I

The ride home was made in silence.  What could they really say to each other, Liz wondered.  She was still a bit confused about what all had just happened. 

They had landed in the desert so as to avoid any notice, and they had been driving ever since.  Again, they headed towards the coast.  Back to California. 

She glanced over at Judas who was looking off into the distance.  The world was dark at the moment, and the sun was hours from rising, but they were in no mood for sleep.

Judas, the bag of chips, looked at Liz and saw her looking at him.  He smiled at her, and she smiled back.  “So, I was just wondering, did we just save the world?” Judas, the bag of chips, asked.

“Yeah,” Liz replied with a smile.  “I’m a little confused about the whole thing, but I do think we saved the Earth.”

(Are you confused yet?)

run III

run III

They rounded the last turn, and stood before the door to the launch bay.  Judas, the bag of chips, cursed Star Trek under his breath for giving him the misconception about doors on a space ship.  No doors opened when you came to them.  Instead, Judas and Liz had to force large bolts to open the doors. 

They made it into the launch bay as they heard boots tromping their way towards the bay.  They closed the door and struggled to close it before the guards could catch up to them.  It took little time to get into their little ship. 

“But one last thing before I go,” Judas, the bag of chips said as he set the device he had taken to detonate only moments after they left the ship.

The bay doors opened as the little car ship lifted off.

“Punching it,” Liz said as she gunned it.  She barely made it through the bay doors, she was in such a hurry.

Space was odd in the way that it never seemed like you were moving unless you were passing something.  With the ship behind them, Liz had no idea how much space had been put between them and the ship before it would blow up. 

They had cruised for a while before they decided to look behind to see what had happened to the ship.

“Wow,” Judas, the bag of chips, exclaimed as he watched the ship implode into itself.

Run II

Run II

“I can not believe that worked,” Judas, the bag of chips said as he and Liz ran down the corridor. 

“Fuck yeah!” Judas, the bag of chips agreed.

The guard was knocked out in the cell.  Honestly, Judas, the bag of chips didn’t think he would have the strength to knock him out once Liz seduced him inside the cell, but it worked.

“Now what do we do?” Liz gasped as they ran for, what was likely, their lives.

“Get off this ship,” Judas, the bag of chips, replied between huffs.

They ran down a corridor, turned to another, and both realized that they were lost.

Liz stopped and took a long deep breath.  “We don’t even know where it is we’re going,” she observed.

Judas smiled as he saw the door with the universal sign that simply stated with one black and yellow picture to be careful with whatever was beyond the door if you didn’t want to blow up.  He opened the door and saw cases with symbols that said the same thing.  “I’ve got an idea,” he said as he grabbed a case that looked like something he could carry.

And it was about then that the alarm sounded.

“Shit!” Liz said, still trying to catch her breath.  “The guard... He’s... up!”