AM hell.. thingy

AM hell.. thingy

So, my sock bit me this morning.  I mean, I was putting on my sock, and I felt teeth!  I yelped and tossed the sock away.  It smiled at me like socks just shouldn't do.  I explaimed, "What the fuck!"

"I am Beil-Nar, the sock demon!" the sock cackled.  "And you are my slave who will do my every bidding!"

I looked at the sock for some time and wondered, "Am I drunk?"

"Why do you ask?" Beil-Nar asked.

I shrugged.  "Because I'm talking to Beil-Nar, the sock demon," I explained.  "So maybe I'm drunk.  Or did someone slip something into my cereal this morning?  I don't know, but I've already got enough friends with Jesus and Judas."

"I am not your friend," Beil-Nar said.  "I am your master!"

"Man, I am so glad I don't jerk off into socks," I said as I fished for another sock from the laundry basket.

"What are you doing?" Beil-Nar demanded to know. 

"I have to go to work," I explained.

"But you must do my bidding!" Beil-Nar stated.

I looked at him and shrugged.  "Maybe after work.  Go play with Judas.  Maybe he'll do what you want.  Or Jesus; he likes plants."

I left the room and passed Judas, TBOC, in the hall way as he headed to watch morning TV with his coffee and a doughnut.  "Hey," Judas, TBOC, said.  "Just to warn you, you've got a sock demon now."

"I know," I said as I put on my coat.  "The little fucker bit me.  So what do I do with a sock demon, anyway?"

Judas, the bag of chips, shrugged.  "I wouldn't put him on, by the sounds of it."

"Funny," I said with a sigh. 

I was in my car when I realized that Judas, TBOC, was eating a doughnut.  You know, the least he could do is buy me a fucking doughnut if he's getting one for himself.

fuck